The Ripon Philharmonic

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The Romantic Cynic: Selections from Heinrich Heine

May no one say that I lack religion. Opium, too, is a religion.

The town itself is beautiful, and looks its best when you turn your back on it.

By and large the inhabitants of Gottinger may be divided into students, professors, philistines and cattle; which four classes are by no means sharply distinct.

There is a wonderful murmuring and babbling, the birds sing fragmentary sounds of yearning, the trees whisper like a thousand girls’ tongues, the strange mountain flowers gaze like a thousand girls’ eyes, stretching out their wondrous broad leaves with their comical serrations, the merry sunbeams flash playfully to and fro, the wise herbs tell one another green fairy-tales, everything seems enchanted, the sense of cozy seclusion grows even stronger, an ancient dream comes to life, the beloved appears – but alas, she soon disappears again!

Her face resembled a palimpsest where the half-erased verses of an ancient Greek love-poet peep from under the monastic black letters of a text by a Father of the church.

He looked like a life-sized reproduction of a fool.

It is a feeling of infinite bliss when the visible world converges with that of our hearts, and green trees, thoughts, birdsong, melancholy, the blue of heaven, memory and fragrance are twined together in sweet arabesques.

It is still morning, the sun has already traversed half its course, and my heart is already giving off such a fragrance that it is going to my head and making me so giddy that I can no longer tell when irony stops and the sky starts, I populate the air with my sighs, and I myself should like to dissolve into sweet atoms, into the uncreated divinity; what will happen when night falls, and the stars appear in the sky…

Life is too, too comically sweet; and the world is so delightfully confused; it is the dream of an intoxicated god, who took French leave from the company of divine wine-bibbers, and lay down to sleep on a lonely star, and does not know himself that he creates everything he dreams of – but it will not be long before the god wakes up, and rubs his sleepy eyes, and smiles – and our world will fade into nothingness, indeed it will never have existed.

To me, every woman is the gift of a world, I revel in the melodies of her face, and with a single glance from my eye I can enjoy more than others can with their whole bodies in all their lives.

 

— Heinrich Heine

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Bonus un-Coverage

Wow, hard to believe a sedentary gent such as UBU is hitting the road yet again — but I’m going to parents weekend in the land where the cheesehead roam and hence will be unable to file any more dispatches from UBULAND until the next regular Tuesday transmission…but here’s bonus Thursday coverage…I was going to do a selection of Heinrich Heine quotes, but have concluded that the following is far more uplifting:
 
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Requiem For a BookFest

Another successful Kerrytown Bookfest – a crowd estimated at 4,000, big time attendance at the panels, good sales by the vendors…a hit…

But yet despite all the outer trappings of success I still have a little bit of a bad taste in my mouth. Most of it is probably because of the fact that the boyscout troops that were supposed to help us didn’t show up at set up or, even more critically, at tear down when we are all already dead tired. But that’s happened before in the past and even then, bone weary and sore, I still had a glow of success, something I just ain’t feeling right now.

I could do a USA today style think piece on the death of civility, my personal Joe Wilson, Serena and Kanye being that fat black lady who punched me repeatedly in the back shrieking I can’t see! I can’t see! as I stepped to the speakers table to tell the food superstars panel that they were already ten minutes into the next panel’s time. Although that charming citizen was the most violent, I certainly got disrespected many times that day for the sin of attempting to keep everybody happy. Jane and Michael Sterns themselves were delightful people and very good sports, but by in large the food crowd made me really appreciate the mystery lovers I usually deal with. My theory is that the foodies are stuck at the oral level of development and can’t help behaving in a passive aggressive infantile manner. Even though the panel was clearly over, the public still couldn’t help bawling out their questions or even just their random memories of the bacon fat and zwieback of their youth, behavior that continued in the book signing line, the people who’d been forced to wait due to it unable to stop themselves from repeating the very same behavior. I felt like a maitre d’ in an extremely fancy restaurant who is suddenly besieged by the entire social register, each swell expecting the best table in the house. And no tips, either.

Another thing that bummed my bliss is that a lot of my motivation in the past has been to be part of a better book festival that the other one in town. That’s not necessarily a negative thing – a healthy rivalry inspires both parties to greater heights – though I’ve always thought they considered us beneath their notice, that is until we opened a can of whip ass on them. I always so enjoyed the pained expressions on their faces as they saw all the people, vendors and writers that turned out for our event. But they didn’t even drop by this year, and it definitely seems like the war’s over and we’ve won – despite all their advantages in funding, publicity and fancy backers (of course, two of their main props, The Shaman Drum and The Ann Arbor News are no more) they’ve really become a non-factor, struggling to get a quarter of the attendance we do and failing to get any authors anybody wants to see and not promoting the ones they manage to get. Their whole publicity platform this year was based on the necessity of downsizing while we just keep growing. I recognize the pettiness of my desire to outdo them, but it’s still kind of a letdown, as I’ve always been more comfortable as an underdog.

Jeffery Deaver and Some Fat Guy

Photo:ANTHCO

The best thing by far was getting to hang with and hear Jeffery Deaver who is not only a mega-best selling author, but also a very smart and way cool guy. Getting to know the authors has always been the thing that made it all worthwhile for us, and Jeff is really a guy worth getting to know, as are his books which I have been devouring.

So ANYWAY, as the muscles become less sore and the bruises fade, things seem better than they did not so long ago. Counting the profits also tends to brighten the mood. Usually we don’t make that much at the Bookfest and it’s always more important to us that the event is a success than if our store makes money, BUT thanks to the Sterns and their devoted fans we did do pretty darn well this year, which always makes back breaking work and the indignities of dealing with the public a lot more palatable, if you will. I don’t really want to think about it now, but yeah, as I slowly get the old UBU mojo back, I’m sure this ass will be hitched up to the cart again next year…

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Educational

I’m still working on my incisive BookFest recap, so in honor of the beginning of school I’ll present this one as a public service:

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B There or B Square

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The Busy Days of Mr. UBU

 

Certainly a confluence of stuff for Mr. UBU. First of all there’s the resumption of the Ann Arbor Public Library book sale. I love the darn thing, and it’s certainly a main source of books for my store and a serendipitous headwater of my meandering thought stream. Because I’ve been at this racket for a while now and they had abbreviated sales this summer, I’m not as wigged out about it as I used to be, but it’s still as pretty close to excited as this jaded old book dealer gets. The drill for the preview which is on a Thursday night is that you join the Friends of the Library (don’t tell my penny pinching peers, but I actually get the membership level above the minimum out of sheer love for the sale) and then you come in when the library opens in the morning and get a line number for the event that night, to spare the library from having a bunch of scruffy misfits waiting in line all day. God knows how long some of them had been hanging out when I got there – to me it’s a waste of time to wait in a line for an hour to gain a forty second jump on everybody else. I try to saunter in just at nine, but usually, like at rock shows. my anticipation gets the better of me and I get there early, in the case only by five minutes, at which point there were two groups, the book dealers and the derelicts waiting to get it. You could tell the difference only because the dealers were more or less in a line. When I got there the distaff half of a creepy book scout couple known as "the machine" handed me a number – this also doesn’t incite me the way it used to, but the fact is that these numbers aren’t issued by the friends of the library at all, and are back by the authority of only this couple themselves, and, frankly, they are not the boss of me. Everyone knows that UBU is a stickler for fair play, and I don’t need them presuming to make sure I know my place. They’d even printed up tidy little numbered slips on their computer with the words Ann Arbor Library Preview Night 2009 on them, proving only that there are certainly people who take the whole thing a lot more seriously than I do. The dealer behind me, a guy I’m slowly starting to like despite his being a jerk who once tried to run me over, earned a little more love by coming even later than me and refusing to take a number at all. Soon enough the doors opened, and we were the tail end except for one old lady who finally asked what the line was for. The dealer explained, and the lady went oh, I thought everybody had to do this to get into the library. That settled she walked past us and I finally got my number, 23 in fact which isn’t quite the lowest I’ve ever had, but close. It also was higher than the 21 which the machine had given me, but no matter.

They kept on handing out numbers for an hour after the library opened and then for another hour before the sale started at six, so by then the number of the numbered had swelled about fifty. Since the order of entry has already been decided, there’s no reason to get there too early, but most people do, for the pleasure of waiting on the steps with their peers I guess. I was pretty much the last to arrive of the people who’d been there when the doors opened, but still had to partake of almost ten minutes of idle chatter. Then the doors open and they call out each number, and yes, after all this time the heart still pounds.

A fairly recent wrinkle in the preview night is that buyers are restricted to twenty books, to foil those evil out of town book dealers I hear. Two years ago under the benevolent Diane, the smaller mass market books, my bread and butter, weren’t included in that number, but last year under the less benevolent Jan they were. Neither of them are at the helm anymore (as far as I can tell nobody really is) so precedent remains in place. When I will chatting with my cashier friend Richard, the U of M football fanatic, I discovered that neither he nor any of his cashier pals were aware of the restriction, and I only wish I’d left with bags full before they were informed of it. But then I’m too honest for that (pause for tumultuous laughter).

But holding the purchase to twenty makes for some hard decisions unrelated to economy, kind of like roster cut day in the NFL. The late Ellis Peters is a very popular pioneering historical author, creator of the Brother Cadfael series of PBS fame, and someone who it seemed like I had a lifetime supply of their books, until one day I looked up and the well was dry. Most of the titles are out of print and some of them are going for big bucks on the net, so I scooped up the ten or so mint paperbacks that were there and then some other sure sells like Lee Child and Donna Leon. The literature section hadn’t seen much fresh entries since the summer sales so I kept searching for it, the book for me, the one mystically meant to fire my imagination and lead me down new paths of knowledge. I couldn’t find it, so I went into the area little traveled by UBU, the specially priced room. A confirmed bottom feeder, I don’t like to pay more that, say three bucks for a book, but sometimes there are good art books, etc., in there that make me go wild, plus specially priced books don’t count toward the twenty total. What I found was this:

Four CD’s and a booklet for $15. I hesitated, but finally plunked down my personal UBU dollars. I wasn’t really sure about it until I looked at it, and it’s a very neat collection of hard to find material – that and the fact that the going ebay cost for the set is $200. Suddenly it seemed a lot better.

This morning was the American Association of University Women sale at 8 am, a massive sale with equally massive prices. I won’t go into the details of that, but it went pretty much as expected, my UBU find being The Heptameron by Marguerite of Navarre Translated From the French privately printed in London, which is, I suppose, code for racy stuff. I paid five bucks for it, when there was no real need for it to be specially priced, but it does look pretty cool.

There often has been the confluence of library sale, AAUW sale and Bookfest, but never, dear reader, has there also been the kick off of the pro football regular season taking place at Heinz field and featuring my beloved Pittsburgh Steelers in the middle of it all, meaning I had to stay up late to watch, with overtime even. I know this a passion that many of my alternative followers do not understand, but, believe me, it is a passion real enough. The Steelers never make it easy for their followers who have them in their hearts, stressing said hearts with slow starts, sudden reversals and nail biting comebacks. Despite all the usual problems, no running game, questionable offensive line play, etc. they managed to do the most important thing, win, baby, win. The NFL supplied hoopla was pretty neat too, seeing Point State Park a field of black and gold, fireworks shooting off the tops of the downtown buildings and the usual breathtaking bridge vistas, but, gad, are The Black Eyed Peas always so lame? And that guy in the black cowboy hat – doesn’t he know it’s a hard hat city? Go back to Nashville, you tiny Titans.

The library sale reopens to the genial, general pubic public tomorrow morning, with no limit, so that’ll be another crazy scene. Then there’s the party at our house that the BookFest authors and presenters will come to – including OMG! The NPR luminaries Jane and Michael Sterns and the mostest bestest selling author I’ll probably ever meet, Jeffery Deaver, whose books I’ve been devouring, and then on Sunday….Oh, Yeah! The 7th annual Kerrytown Bookfest. Whew.

Wow, too much information, huh? Who knew that the life of a small time book dealer was so dull? So, I won’t tell you I also did two bad things today, one accidentally and one on purpose, and it looks like I’m going to get away with both of them, but, like I said, we won’t go into that, heh-heh, but just remember that the next time I get all holier that thou.)

YR PAL,

UBU

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The Clairvoyant Princess

Norway’s Princess Märtha Louise, daughter of King Harald and Queen Sonja, has emerged as a clairvoyant, and is launching an alternative school aimed at training students to contact angels.
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Crime Beat: Have a Ball

 

Fayette County man fires cannonball through neighbor’s house

 

Police said a man in Georges Township, Fayette County, fired a metal cannon that sent a two-pound lead ball into his neighbor’s house.

William Edward Maser, 54, fired the cannon in his yard on Tent Church Road Wednesday evening, said Trooper Brian Burden of the Pennsylvania State Police. He said he was not sure how regularly Mr. Maser fired his cannon.

The cannon shot a lead ball through the side of his neighbor’s house, breaking a window and traveling through a wall before landing in a clothes closet. No one was injured.

The cannon is an 80-pound homemade replica of cannons used during the French and Indian War. It has been impounded as evidence.

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Veronica’s Existential Epiphany

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